"In December, the principal household duty lies in preparing for the creature comforts of those near and dear to us, so as to meet old Christmas with a happy face, a contented mind, and a full larder; and in stoning the plums, washing the currants, cutting the citron, beating the eggs, and mixing the pudding, a housewife is not unworthily greeting the genial season of all good things".

Hello Darlings.You now you've done enough now don't you? That Christmas is upon us, all is well with the world, and that none of those little niggly "got to be dones" really matter now?
Don't worry... you are not alone in feeling that no matter how much you plan, no matter what you do, no matter how organised you are, Christmas still manages to take you by surprise.. that your little pile of stocking fillers remains woefully small, that there are cards you forgot to write and brandy butter you forgot to buy and that above all else the Christmas you have created does not quite have the finesse of the Christmas you imagined...


You are not alone... the past hour here at Chez Brocante has been spent stringing up yet another string of lights around the greenery I dragged in from a walk the other day. I can't quite get the balance between twinkly and erm.... well Blackpool lights. And so I have today spent way too much time winding them in and out of the the laurel leaves, steeping over Finley to wrap them around the candlesticks standing tall either side of the mantelpiece and entertaining passing friends and neighbours by forcing them to endure the seven different ways the lights can twinkle (From static to all out flashing disco), so I can at the end of the day hold a consensus and make a decision...


And you know what? It doesn't matter. Now that I am finally sitting down, the lights are fading softly in tune with the flicker of many candles, and none of all the fussy little things that have been worrying my sleep matter anymore. I can't buy more presents. There isn't time to do any more baking. The house is quite as decorated as it's going to be, the beds are made with sheets starched to high heaven, our Christmas Eve Jim Jams are suitably cinnamony and short of declaring myself Sergeant Major and insisting the rest of the family dance to my rather demented tune, there is nothing more I can do to guarantee Christmas bliss other than relax and go with the tinselly flow...


This year will be the same as  the last.There will be toys without batteries. One of the kids will no doubt have the screaming ab-dabs.  Somebody will cry. Somebody will steal all the gifts out of the Christmas Crackers and stash them in her bra. Mum will have forgotten something crucial to the Christmas meal and we all, every single one of us delight and despair in the never changing round of that which is guaranteed at Christmas. Vintage family rituals are the bestest kind...

So yes, this year will be the same as the last. And yet, and yet, and yet.... in houses across the land thing will be different. People who sat at the table the year before may no longer be with us. Purse strings have been tightened to a degree some of us have never experienced, and children who once believed in Santa may have developed a scepticism we could hardly countenance in one so young. Things change. In my world, sadly, it will be the last time we spend Christmas in my childhood home...

Things change. And in the end it is only people that matter. Whether the lights wrapped around your mistletoe are doing a highland jig or dancing the Christmas Polka...

And so my Darling, in this my Christmas Card to each and everyone of you, I say enough now...you've done all you can and now it's time to snuggle up into the heart of those we love, put stressing about the state of your kitchen floor aside for three days and really enjoy all that Christmas is meant to be...

Enjoy it Sweethearts.

"My husband gave me a broom for Christmas. This wasn't right. No-one can tell me  it was meant kindly."

Grace Paley.

It is, I believe, ritual rather than housekeeping that has been the mainstay of BrocanteHome,because much as I consider some of the lowlier joys of homemaking to be a necessary evil, it is my personal and familial rituals that I hold most dear...

Rituals fall in to two categories- those that happen almost by accident and instantly become beautiful habit, and those that we design and force ourselves to repeat for the comfort we know they will ultimately bring. Ritual can be something relatively simple: always using a certain cup and saucer to drink cranberry tea is a ritual, as is following a complex pattern of behavior before snuggling up in bed at night. The fact that my sister insists on stuffing every Christmas cracker gift down her bra at the Christmas dinner table is a ritual as is the fact that every year my Dad refuses to to follow the ritual of collecting and binning the wrapping paper and I have something of a two minute hissy fit because he isn't doing what he should and then he goes and gets a bin bag and we all feel better... a ritual that has evolved from an effort to maintain a childhood certainty that made me feel that another year had passed but the world was as it should be...

What ritual to the Vintage Housekeeper however, is not, is compulsive. It is not set in stone and each of the little rituals we use to trim our daily and indeed seasonal routines should be constantly evolving and altering to reflect our way of life if they are to continue to bless our days in constantly changing circumstances.

In a December like this one, ritual becomes our mainstay. It is perhaps something personal, but it seems to me that this year the universe isn't putting on the pantomime that is Christmas with quite it's usual level of commitment to tinselly over indulgence, frenzied spending and merry enthusiasm. Perhaps it is this so called, media generated, "credit crunch". Perhaps we are afraid of throwing money at something that seems frivolous in a climate where too many people's livelihoods continue to be threatened. Perhaps there is something terrifying about standing in the certainty that is Woolworths two weeks before Christmas and watch a shop that is part of all our childhoods, try to liquidate its stock in crazy sales during a season in which we expect to pay top dollar for every item we chose to stuff in our bubbas stockings with. All of a sudden the world feels wobbly and somewhat jaded...

I don't know why. But I do know that Christmas doesn't feel the same this year. That everything is tinged with the unfamiliar taste of real, necessary frugality, and worse than that, the gentle sting of something like guilt. In some quarters Christmas 2008 is being held up as the year that will in history prove to be a turning point in the way that we all live: that blatant commercial endeavours will be replaced by acts of random goodness, that frugality and green ethics will have to establish a balance that makes it possible for an organic way of life to be achievable for every Tom, Dick and Sally, and not a way of life exclusive only to those who can afford it, and that in the long term we all benefit for having had the very fabric of our lives threatened by the kind of fat cat financial mismanagement we may or may not tolerate in the future.

And so as a society, and indeed as individuals we have no choice but to seek the comfort of familiar ritual, even if our expectations of those very rituals have to be shifted to reflect a way of life inflicted upon us by the powers that be. It is after all, entirely possible, that if for whatever reason whether it be ethical or financial, we choose to consume less, the rituals that stitch families together will gain greater significance in our lives, because we only have to look to the children in our lives to understand that it is the rituals of the festive season that matter most, and that we have an opportunity as the only generation of adults to have ever lived in a climate where money was almost no object and where value was measured by price, to shake off greed as a way of life and teach our children to really embrace the spirit of daily and seasonal celebration.

Oh I do absolutely love the idea of stuffing a tiny little stocking with gift's inspired by The Nutcracker. Good old Martha Stewart has a list of suggested gifts for boys and girls alike and I think a stripy woolly stocking (I bought one in Ikea of all places... that and some meatballs) full of terribly old fashioned bits of childhood treasure hung on the iron bedpost of Finley's daybed on Christmas Eve morning would be the perfect antidote to the piles of plastic Santa will no doubt deliver the next day...


Next thing you know I'll be dressing him up in breeches and stockings and insisting he is seen and not heard.
In my dreams m'ladies, in my dreams.

Christmas comes but once a year but please try telling that to every frazzled Mummy in the land. With just 34 days to go until the  heavenly headache that is the festive season is upon us , sadly it is time to abandon scrumptious visions of chocolate box Christmases and get down to the nitty gritty of  actually making it happen...


We have already purged our  souls and surfaces. We have  printed lists and downloaded planners to our hearts content. No doubt we have  all clipped perfect Christmases out of  airbrushed lives in our favorite magazines and done our upmost to curtail Christmas wish lists that threaten to bankrupt us... Yes we know Christmas is coming because the happy little elf living inside our heart is dancing with glee while our bones  ache with pre-emptive exhaustion...


Tis time I'm afraid to get this show on the road and lay the foundations of a season we will cherish (and probably laugh about) for always...


Firm Foundations.


* Money is the root of all evil and never more so than at Christmas when the whole world seems to be screaming SPEND! But this year is the year to turn over a new leaf. To say tis the experience of Christmas that counts. The spectacle of it. Memories of mince pie making and dusk walks Christmas tree spotting. Tis the room filled to the brim with snow flake sprinkled balloons left by Santa on Christmas morning that will remain in a childs memory. The delivery of fresh flowers on Christmas Eve in your Mums. If you can't get every gift on your childs list then so be it. Give them memories to treasure, because they are the only things they will take into their future. So resolve here and now not to feel guilty about buying a bigger turkey rather than shoving another bit of plastic junk into your little boys stocking and CONCENTRATE on making magic...


* Plan, plan, plan and plan again. I am naturally a coast it and lets see what happens kinda gal. Money turns up and events on my calender fall into festive place. Most of the time. But along the way I suffer bouts of unnecessary festive anxiety I drown in spiked hot chocolate and then wonder why I find myself without sellotape on Christmas Eve, letting people down left, right and centre  and only dreaming of all the things I think Christmas should authentically be.  Enough already. Make a list. Check it twice and re-invent yourself as a woman with a plan. Should you see me wandering the streets with an earpiece and clipboard just nod and understand.


* Divide what needs to be done over the four weeks. Make your master grocery list and divide it into four shopping trips. Non perishables and household stuff  this week, stuff that can be frozen (or made and frozen) next , sweets and fripperies the third week and all your fresh stuff the fourth. Etc, Etc...


* Now is the time to schedule a pre-christmas scrub. If you are using the planner the two day scrub is detailed there (and can of course be spread across five evenings etc). Christmas is a dusty affair and the last thing you want to do is lay it upon existing grub so trust me having a house thoroughly prepped will make all the difference to  the rest of the month and  go a long way to  making Christmas feel as calm and pure as it should be... What are you waiting for? Tie a happy gingham pinny on and get  going!


*  This really should be the last week to order Christmas presents via mail or internet. I know there is a month left but who wants to leave Christmas in the hands of strike prone postmen or natural disaster? Who needs that kinda stress? So sit down in snuggly jim-jams, wail along with Bing and navigate the confusing muddle (Might be the time to give Shoeboxed a go?) that is trying to think straight when you are shopping online... Do it tonight!


Things To Do This Week.


1. Make your Christmas card lists. Badger men and kids for  names they consider it essential  to greet at Christmas time.  Make sure you've got enough cards and seek out a pretty pen  specially for the purpose. Perhaps a fountain pen with hunter green ink for a calligraphic flourish?


2. Make your mincemeat for strudels and unusual pies and freeze. Then while you are in cooking mode do something deliciously old-fashioned and Christmassy like make Marzipan fruits...


3. Plant paperwhite bulbs in all manner of scrumptious vintage china cups, vases etc for a delicious display during Christmas week (Three to five weeks to bloom indoors so NOW)... And people? Put them everywhere: they cost practically nothing and fill the heart with  gladness.


4.  Buy stamps. Pay or arrange to pay mithering bills. Confirm times of church services, nursery pantomimes and hair appointments. Service the car. You know. Do the dull stuff...


5. Make some Christmas morning Jam to be served with warm croissants and christmas gifts... Choose a breakfast cocktail (cranberry juice and champagne?) and write it on your menu planner or fill homemade vintage paper crackers with white chocolate for a  snowy Christmas morning treat... Who needs Dinner when Christmas Day breakfast is going to be such a treat?

If I ever drop by and find you dangling sausages from your fake Christmas Tree there will be trouble, do you understand? Because yes indeed, click on the image above and you will see that this darling little vintage advert suggests poking your Hor D'oevres or canapes on to the branches of this stunning centrepiece...

Everyone loves the Wonder Tree.

My mornings have been blessed with the washing line acrobatics of my resident robin. My elevenses taken in front of twelve windows full of winter pink sky. All is well, but the slates fell off my roof and landed in my laundry room, my broadband connection is hopeless, and Christmas is but a sniff of sherry away...

And so yet again fate steps in and forces me out of my virtual world and into the one fragranced by mince pies. The universe says enough! Be in the moment.  Laugh till you cry  at the pantomine and cry till you laugh at  the antics of your son dressed as a squirrel  in his school nativity play. Brush off the over anxious diagnosis of  dyspraxia by a nursery teacher clearly confusing chatty enthusiasm with the very modern need to label every child brimming with life as "special" and worry that you are going to arrive at Christmas morning having forgotten to buy something important for someone very special indeed. Attend yet another Hen night. Wrap the whole house up in brown paper and hope against all hope that in the blink of an eye you will be sitting at your Mum's Christmas table watching your sister shove tangerines down her bra while your Auntie Barbie stashes all the Christmas Cracker gifts down hers, with the madness of commercial frenzy over and only the chaotic bliss of family to be enjoyed and loony amounts of chocolate pudding available to fill your thighs with.


All is well.  Nature is  rosy and strangely still.  Society a teeny bit bonkers. Light bulbs keep popping and my text messages arrive via Saturn three days after they should. My computer doesn't work and my tv keeps freezing. So I'm hearing the world loud and clear. I'm hearing promises of tomorrows and the giggle of my happy little robin doing his trapeze act. I'm missing you all. Missing my lifeline to the world outside my berry wreathed door and enjoying the peace that is always my calamity driven life.
This weekend there will be a German Christmas market and mulled wine in gloved hands. Gift wrapping and chocolate coated flapjacks. Stocking fillers and  twinkly lights. A morning in the garden and the horror that is the possibility of snow or frosty car windows on the school run...

Enough I think. Enough for me at least. But back soon Sweeties, I promise.

Goodness, tis all very well filling your Christmas Planner with all manner of scrumptious ideas, delicious recipes and inspired gift ideas, but if you find yourself in a demented rush to buy seven types of Christmas Pudding and every roll of Baroque style wrapping paper you come across before your pumpkin has even gone mouldy, mark my words you will live to regret it in a home not yet prepped for the injections of fripperie and nonsense the festive season thrusts upon it...

And so before the splurge must come the purge. In a world where even babies are now  considered jeopardy to our dubious green credentials, we have something of an obligation not to add too frivoulously to the mountain of debt and badly chosen gifts that Christmas always leaves in it's wake and perhaps more pertinently, for our own sanity, we need to  clear the decks  on every level, emotionally, physically and spirtually before  we will be really up to  donning our party hats, stuffing the turkey and dancing the Christmas polka...

So just for this week, curb your festive enthusiasm and lets detox house, home and proverbial hearth and take stock of what we've got before the countdown to Christmas really begins...

1. Food first (because I'm greedy).  It's time to live out of the freezer. While this may make for some wacky meal combinations for dinner, it is essential if you are going to find the room for cranberry muffin dough, chestnut butter, and other swoon making indulgences. Start now. Have  frozen carrot omelette with fishcakes for supper tonight.You know you want to.

2. Take stock of the basics. Flours, butter, lard, sugars, spices, dried fruits, alcohol etc, etc. Use up the dregs, clean out tins and jars and leave open to air dry. Seek out Christmassy tins and line with greaseproof paper ready for festive baking sessions and give all baking and roasting tins and trays a thorough good seeing to with a baking powder and lemon scrub...

3. Get Christmas decorations down and see how the festive land lies. Are your lights working? Have all your baubles survived hibernation?   Forgot you had that? Thought you had more? Don't leave it to the last minute to be disappointed. Throw away what's past it's best. Decide what can be recycled and re-invented. What needs to be lovingly wrapped back in tissue paper for another year and replaced to grace this years tree. This should prevent too many "just had to have it" incidents in your local Winter Wonderland....

4. Get the arguments over with once and for all. Establish your festive plans now and let all concerned know exactly whose Christmas dinner you will be devouring and who you want to be kising under the mistletoe. If you are having a buy nothing Christmas warn the family. Tell the person cooking you've becoma a vegan. May as well get the hissy fits over and done with so you jig your way into December on an atmosphere free cloud..

5. If you have read "The Secret" (and who hasn't?) you will know that if you want all your dreams to come true you've got to make room for them... So if you are eeking out the dregs of your last bottle of Chanel, chuck it all down your cleavage instead, et voila! room for more perfume in your Christmas stocking! Should also work on rubbish men, holey underwear and worn out dreams. Clear the decks and make room for oodles of scrumptiousness... 


6.   Lie to the kids. Tell them Santa only brings more gifts if there's room for them. Give them a box each and watch in wonder as it fills up with toys they are willing to sacrifice. Book a day in your diary to deliver the boxes to local charity shops and make another little ones Christmas special...

7. Trust me re-gifting isn't a sin punishable by a life long jail term. T'isn't even social suicide unless you are really stupid and re-gift something gruesome right back to the one who oh so generously bestowed it upon you in the first place. Scour the house for stuff you already own and are more than willing to offer to a more grateful home. Nobody but you will know. 


8.  Work out what you've got left over from last year. This goes for cards, gift wrap, tags, ribbon, stockings, Christmas linen, crackers, candles etc, etc. Buy nothing until you rooted around your imagination and used what you already have.  If you've got an abundance of brown paper, joy of joys you are having a brown paper Christmas, liberally livened up with all manner of scrumptious vintage ephemera or some oh so chic french christmas ribbon...

9. Set yourself a challenge. Tell yourself your festive budget must be in line with  funds raised through an Ebay marathon. Get rid of your junk and use the pennies sitting happily in your paypal account to  fund Christmas.  No more, no less. Now theres an incentive to  detox the nonsense and save yourself a small fortune if ever there was one...

10.   Use up all the old bottles of shampoo, bars of soap, air freshners, washing up liquid etc, in fact everything comsumable before you allow yourself to spend a single  penny on Chrismas scented  luxury. Yes you are contractually required to indulge yourself with the most scrumptious of everything in December but only when all the bottles you've got clogging up your bathroom cabinet are in the recycling bin...